Happiness

How many times have you said, "I just want to be happy."?  Or "I'm not happy"?  Have you ever looked at other people and wished you were as happy as they are?  I was talking to someone I love VERY much last night and she said, "I just want to be happy."  This blog is for her although I believe that she listens to my words right now but she can't hear them.  Here are my happy bullet points:

1.  Happiness is not a constant state.  We don't all of a sudden discover something that makes us happy and then we stay happy for ever and ever amen.  For every positive in life, there is a negative thus the thing that we thought would make us happy will some day make you sad as well. 

2.  Another person can not make you happy. 

3.  You can't buy happiness--believe me, I've tried.  (LOL)  If you don't believe me watch any of the "Real Housewives" shows.  They have LOTS of money and they still go through divorces, fight with each other and have drinking problems.  Look at celebrities or children of celebrities-- some of them are a mess.  My Grandma Geiser always says, "We didn't have much but we had enough", with that attitude, rich or poorish, you can still be happy.

4.  Find the things that help you to create moments of happiness.  I can always count on a song, my son, my dog or a hug from my husband to make me happy.  I remember times when I was sad about an ended relationship, listening to the same heartbreaking song over and over and over again.  Why did I do that?  I was just making myself miserable. 

5.  Live in the moment.  When you are experiencing a happy moment, stop, recognize it and hold on to it for as long as you can as each moment in time is unique--it can not be re-created again.  Some of my happiest times were at Grandma Rita and Grandma Tina's house on the hill.  We drank coffee and hung out in the kitchen laughing and talking and I felt safe and happy.  Grandma Rita and Grandma Tina died and all of us live in different parts of the world. I really miss those times.  We have had other moments like that when we all get together and a semblance of those magical moments were recreated but they will never be the same.

6.  Do not compare yourself to others in your pursuit of happiness.  If you believe that you will be happy by getting or achieving what someone else has you will live a life filled with frustration and self-doubt.  There will always be someone who has more than you and there will always be someone that has less than you whether you are comparing money, fat, or anything that exists that can be compared in some manner.  Set personal bars and standards then start your journey.  There will be successes along the way and their will be failures.  Don't give up and don't be too hard on yourself--maybe through that journey you will experience many moments of happiness.

7.  Pray.  Prayer gives you peace of mind and happiness.  As you thank God for everything he has given you, list those things and you will realize that you have a lot to be happy about.

8.  Laugh out loud every day.

9.  Cry every once in a while.  I'm not sure who said this and it's not an exact quote but you must experience sadness to experience joy.  Plus, I believe if you are holding sadness inside you,  it encompasses your being and you can not experience true joy.  Get rid of the sadness.  Purge it by talking about it, writing about it, screaming into a pillow with the goal of getting rid of the sadness. 

I end my happiness blog with a quote from Groucho Marx, "Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.  I can choose which it shall be.  Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet.  I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it."